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Many people have complicated feelings about apologies, and not all of our thoughts and feelings about apologies line up. Some of us were forced to apologize as children when we hurt someone, and some of us apologized freely and felt immediately better after having done so. Some people feel shamed by apologizing while others feel ashamed until we have done so.

Apologies re-establish dignity for those you hurt. Letting the injured party know that you know it was your fault, not theirs, helps them feel better, and it helps them save face.

Apologizing helps repair relationships by getting people talking again, and makes them feel comfortable with each other again.

A sincere apology allows you to let people know you're not proud of what you did, and won't be repeating the behavior. That lets people know you're the kind of person who is generally careful not to hurt others and puts the focus on your better virtues, rather than on your worst mistakes.

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