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English, 17.03.2021 23:40 bryson9604

. . . Initially, Jing-Mei, and presumably Tan, was young enough that she also believed in this dream of fame and success. Jing-Mei said, “in the beginning I was just as excited as my mother, maybe even more so. I pictured this prodigy part of me as many different images, and tried each one on for size. I was a dainty ballerina. . . I was like the Christ child. . . I was Cinderella. . .” (The Joy Luck Club 133). So, mother and daughter worked together tirelessly to achieve this shared dream. . . .But as much as the dream of becoming a child prodigy brought mother and daughter together in a shared project, eventually it worked just as hard to drive them apart. While Suyuan still believed Jing-Mei could become a prodigy, Jing-Mei became more and more disheartened as she realized the dream was unrealistic. “[S]omething inside me began to die,” she said, because she never passed her mother’s tests. She “performed listlessly” on purpose on those tests and watched to see when her mother would finally give up (The Joy Luck Club 134-135). “I got so bored that I started counting the bellows of the foghorns. . . seeing if my mother would give up on me before eight bellows,” she said (The Joy Luck Club 135). Eventually, Suyuan gives up on Jing-Mei after only one or two bellows: the dream was finally dying for both of them. In the end, Suyuan’s dream of Jing-Mei becoming a child prodigy does more to drive them apart than it did to bring them together. The central idea of this essay is that dreams can drive people apart as well as bring them together. Given this, which revision would best improve this paragraph?

including outside research about other child prodigies and their relationships with their parents.

including further evidence of what Jing-Mei and Suyuan do together to reach their shared dream.

including further analysis of why the dying of the dream drives Suyuan and Jing-Mei apart.

adding a conclusion sentence that ties the main idea of the paragraph to the central idea of the thesis.

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. . . Initially, Jing-Mei, and presumably Tan, was young enough that she also believed in this dream...
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