Once upon a time...No, no, no! Hold it! Scratch that, would you? Why does it have to be "Once upon a time" ,all the time? How about, "Dude, it was just yesterday when you said... ", or, "I wasn't even born when this story happened, so don't blame me if I don't get it right... “Your turn; change the opening, will you?

The correct answer to this open question is the following.

If what you are asking is to write the first lines of a traditional fairytale, but changing that traditional approach to something different, innovative, or funny, then we can help you with the following.

Instead of the trite, corny, old-fashion "Once upon a time, in a far, far place" What about this:

Somebody says this happened in the Middle Ages, but who cares. Not me. The thing is that there are a couple of morals in this story that could make you think about your role in life.

This is a story about character and determination. No beautiful towns, no bords, farm animals in a cozy village next to a beautiful river on a shinny hill. No handsome prince, no attractive princess. Just crude and raw day-to-day issues of life that would make you think how fortunate you are to live in different times...

replace   c   with   a   and simplify.

a = c , b = a, q = n , 2 , a = c , 900 b= a , 700 , q = n , 600 , 2 = b o t h , b = a , q = n

my ding dong   is hard as a rock